Monday, February 28, 2011


I have enjoyed waking up over the past few days hearing what I call the spring birds. They start chirping around 6 and I love waking up to their songs. They make me smile because they remind me that God is in control. A scripture that I enjoy reading and reminding myself is....

Matthew 6:26
26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

I hope that this scripture reminds you that you are cared for, and more importantly loved. Tomorrow when you wake up, listen for those sweet birds and let their song be a reminder that God is in control of your day and you are His.

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Thursday, February 24, 2011

Deep Breath

Well friends, I have had a very long few days, but I am happy to report I did get a call from my Dr and all the cells aspirated were cancer free!!!! Praise God. I am so thankful for the news, but through this situation I have realized my deep fear of death and just how long I have been dealing with this fear.

I believe it is time to face this fear of death head on. So, for tonight I am going to celebrate and thank God. Soon I will tell you how I feel God is teaching me to overcome fear.

Thanks for praying.

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Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Faith over fear

Late January I went to my doctor for my yearly appointment. We talked about the weather, Christmas, and all the other fun stuff you discuss to avoid what is really happening. During an exam my Dr found a small lump in my left breast. He told me to come back in five weeks and not to worry and he was not concerned. Fast forward to yesterday and my follow up appointment. Dr found the same bump, and was pleased it hadn't grown, but felt we needed to investigate further. He took the time to numb me up and aspirated the lump. (I have no idea what I am saying). That was not a fun process. The next step was to schedule a mammogram and ultrasound. Thankfully they could get me in the following morning for both....I was thinking great I will have an answer soon. Unfortunately when the tech went to do the ultrasound this morning there was too much bruising from the procedure yesterday that they couldn't give me a 100% answer about this lump. The mammogram was clear, and the Dr encouraged me by saying if were her ultrasound she wouldn't be concerned. I think I freaked her out when I started to cry. She said that I needed to come back in a month for another ultrasound that my body needed time to heal. She also told me to bring in the lab work from my original appointment. The Dr and tech were wonderful and I felt very comfortable as they were manipulating my body. I mean least we were on a first name basis.

What I am learning through this is that God is constant. He is the same in every situation and He will not leave me. I know that all the scripture I read, every song I sing, and every prayer I say is heard. My prayer is that this is nothing, but as I walk through the next few days waiting for test results I will have no doubt God is with me. I want to live with faith not fear.

In my life, be lifted high
In my world, be lifted high
In my love, be lifted high

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Saturday, February 19, 2011


Who couldn't love a face like that (drool and all)

I have been hearing on the radio over the last few months about a word that you want to committ to for 2011. As you can see, this was a challenge that came out in early January, to start the new year, but it has taken me a few weeks to confirm my word for 2011. I am happy to report that my word is....
I feel like this word has been brought to my attention by friends, the bible, and I really believe that this is the word the Holy Spirit has been whispering to me. I feel called to love in so many ways. I get to love my family. I am such a lucky girl when it comes to the people that live under the same roof as me. God has blessed me with an amazing husband and a wonderful son. We are so blessed to have the gift of Camden, and I pray each day that I can love him and guide him in the ways that Jesus has taught me. I pray each day that I am leading him in the ways that God wants him to go, not the ways that I want him to go. It is hard to let go daily to the fact that he is ultimately God's child and I have just been entrusted to his care here on earth. That is a lot of responsibility.

I get to love my friends. This girl is lucky when it comes to great friends. I have people that speak truth (not always easy) to me. They guide, encourage, and love me where I am and for who I am. They also don't want me to stay the person I am today....they want me to grow in my faith and they want me to overcome my fears. I can't tell you what it means to have friends who will pray and encourage you with scripture.
I get to love my job(s) know my heart is full when it comes to my current job at Southland. I get to go in three times a week and when I leave it is hard to wipe the smile off my face. I leave filled up. I enjoy work, and I so enjoy the people I get to work with. I am also looking forward to my new adventure in the fall. I know what I am getting into with the Preschool team, and trust me, it is like family. This is a group of women who will do anything for anyone....they have huge hearts and I LOVE that I am being called back to TLS. I also get to love my sweet Acorn class...more specifically ten spunky two year olds, including my own little guy. I want the focus of my classroom to be love. I want those sweet kiddos to come in each day to a warm hug, and leave the same way. My dream is to instill a love for learning and school. I want to have fun, but I want those tots to feel loved.
I think that I am ready to pour out love on others because of the love that I know is poured out on me by Jesus.

Epesians 2:4-5

"But God is so rich in mercy, and he LOVED us so much, that even though we are dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead."
Thank you Jesus....I can't imagine that sacrifice now as a mom.

Psalm 91
1 You who sit down in the High God’s presence, spend the night in Shaddai’s shadow,2 Say this: “God, you’re my refuge. I trust in you and I’m safe!”3 That’s right—he rescues you from hidden traps, shields you from deadly hazards.4 His huge outstretched arms protect you— under them you’re perfectly safe; his arms fend off all harm.5 Fear nothing—not wild wolves in the night, not flying arrows in the day,6 Not disease that prowls through the darkness, not disaster that erupts at high noon.7 Even though others succumb all around, drop like flies right and left, no harm will even graze you.8 You’ll stand untouched, watch it all from a distance, watch the wicked turn into corpses.9 Yes, because God’s your refuge, the High God your very own home,10 Evil can’t get close to you, harm can’t get through the door.11 He ordered his angels to guard you wherever you go.12 If you stumble, they’ll catch you; their job is to keep you from falling.13 You’ll walk unharmed among lions and snakes, and kick young lions and serpents from the path.14 “If you’ll hold on to me for dear life,” says God, “I’ll get you out of any trouble. I’ll give you the best of care if you’ll only get to know and trust me.15 Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times; I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party.16 I’ll give you a long life, give you a long drink of salvation!”
Psalm 91 is a reminder to me of God being my refuge...he will keep me safe, and he ultimately LOVES me. I hope that this is a reminder of who you are and that most of all, you are LoVeD.

Thursday, February 17, 2011


Excitement might be an understatement as I think about this new job. I didn't think I would get back into the classroom this soon, but since I get to take my boy with me....I am rearing and ready to go. I have bought my planbook....dated it, put in our breaks, and have a rough idea of our themes for next year. I have been on Amazon looking at different board books to share with my kids, I have bought some border for my bulletin boards, and yes I am dusting off all my M&M stuff to make their appearance again (I didn't realize I had four blow up ones...Nakada may want to borrow one). I have sketched out where I think furniture will go, what my bulletin boards will look like and started (maybe completed) my orders. I AM CRAZY! I am just itching to get into that room and make it Acorn ready....that is the name of the class....Acorns. Along with the excitement comes some; 10 two year olds, diapers, 3 hours of 10 two year olds, and did I mention they were two? I have been spending some quality time with my favorite two year old lately, and he give me hope in my future career.

As for now, I still get to work at SCC until the end of May. I love that job, and honestly the only con when exploring this new opportunity was leaving SCC. It is a place where I leave filled up and with a smile on my face. I love the people and believe in the mission. I have been so lucky to work there. I will always be around SCC too, I will continue to volunteer and attend, so they can't get rid of me! What a lucky girl I am to have such great opportunities and blessings.

Monday, February 14, 2011


This could be a really long post. I don't know, what I do know is that it has been way too long.

So much has happened over the past few weeks and it has happened FAST.

It all started at our January staff meeting when a friend of mine came to pray with me. He encouraged me through God's word, during a really sad time for me. I still struggle today with comprehending I lost a baby, and I don't think I have accepted the word miscarriage, but I do believe that through the sadness God will make me stronger. Below is what was said to me. I heard those words with tears streaming down my face, knowing that the only blessing I thought would replace our loss would be a baby, and we all know what statistics say about our chances.

The Word I heard was: “There are future blessings in store” a word of encouragement and of expectation – that you can get excited and expectant for the future – God’s moving and planning to bless in the future!

The Scripture I got was: 1 Corinthians 5:7b-8: Christ, our Passover Lamb, has been sacrificed for us.8 So let us celebrate the festival, not with the old bread of wickedness and evil, but with the new bread of sincerity and truth.

So I left our January staff meeting with expectation and peace in my heart that God does love me and He does hear my cries. I told Colin about my conversation and have saved it in my inbox so I can read and be reminded of His love daily.

Fast forward to Friday, February 28th. While working at SCC I received an email from my preschool director at The Lexington School inquiring about a new program they are starting next fall for twos. Donna said some really amazing things about my teaching and then asked if I would be interested in coming back to teach this program. It will be Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from 8-12 AND Camden can be a part of the class. I immediately forwarded the email to Colin, who said we needed to explore this opportunity further and I should meet with Donna. So that afternoon, I went to discuss the details with Donna. The rest of that weekend Colin and I dreamed about my current job and the new opportunity and which would be best for our family. I also prayed, a lot! I really want to be sure I am following God's lead and doing what He wants and not what I want.

I have had numerous meetings with Donna and it looks like I am going to be back in the classroom next Fall. I know that teaching will provide me with more time with my boy, and provide him an amazing education thru Kindergarten with my friends at TLS. So, what I can say is God has blessed me, He has given me 10 two year olds to love and nurture, including my son. I can say that I am so sad to leave SCC, but know I will still be around by serving. I will miss my friends that I get to see throughout the week, and am do thankful for those friendships, but believe in all my heart that God is calling me back to the classroom. So I need to get used to hearing Mrs. stout again, mixed in with some mom!!!

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