"But the story we're given is a God-story, not an Abraham (Emily, fill in your name)-story. What we read in Scripture is, "Abraham entered into what God was doing for him, and that was the turning point. He trusted God to set him right instead of trying to be right on his own."
Man this smacked me right in between the eyes this morning....Abraham entered into what GOD WAS DOING for him, not what Abraham was doing for God. How many times have I been doing my own thing and expected for God to join in...."Oh wow Emily! That is such a great idea, I NEVER thought of that....." Yeah right, I can't see the whole picture, only He knows where I am going, I just have to follow in faith HIS plan. I was reading through my blogs a year ago, right when we started in-vitro and just felt that part of my story I totally trusted God...we made the decision to do in-vitro and never looked back. We let God write that story, and thankfully it did end the way I wanted it to. I have a son, a happy, healthy, beautiful boy! So if I trusted God through that situation, why is it so hard to trust him each day? I mean it's not just in the big stuff God is writing my story...it is every second, every minute, every hour, every day! He is using little old me, and I know I miss opportunities each day because I selfishly take over, choose the comfortable route and ignore His promptings. Boy, I have a lot to learn.
"But if you see that the job is too big for you, that it's something only God can do, and you trust him to do it—you could never do it for yourself no matter how hard and long you worked—well, that trusting-him-to-do-it is what gets you set right with God, by God. Sheer gift"
I was in the recliner with Camden last night. We were reading a book (Pajama Time, is one of the best!), and then said a quick prayer together. I remember feeling so inadequate to be in the position I am in. A mom, what a HUGE responsibility...I have a little life to raise, to love, and to grow in God's way. I started to freak out a little bit....Camden is around for good, he is going to be a toddler, a teenager, and hopefully a dad one day too (Lord willing). I am the person (and Colin) that God gave this responsibilty to, I am the one that has to set an example, discipline him, and ultimately love him forever. Now don't get me wrong, I am up for this, I am all about being a mom....but as I reflected on all that God whispered to my spirit, "you are not alone, WE are going to do this together." That is all I needed....We are not alone.....we have this amazing God who knows the plans he has for Camden and as long as we trust and seek Him for wisdom we will be OK.
So whereever you are, if you think that the job in front of you or the story He is writing for you is too big.....it is not, we can do ALL things through Christ who gives us strength. Pray if you are worried, trust that Big man upstairs, He loves each of us and knows us better than any one person (every hair on your head).
So my prayers is that there be less of me everyday, that God grow more and more in my life and that I am listening to the story HE is writing, and know that story is never too big!
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