My first edit would definately be college. I could have had such a different experience had I been focused on what was true. I was chasing after the next best thing...out there to have fun with wreckless abandon. I don't know how my parents didn't kill me during that time (I attended 4 colleges in KY before graduating....I really missed out on true friendships because I was so selfish). I was on the fence one day sold out to Jesus the next partying. I wish I could go back and edit 18-22.
I loved high school. I had amazing friends in high school, but I was dating a boy very seriously and we were going to get married. I was so involved in that relationship that I let so many people go. Because I was so focused on this boy, I lost my friends. I don't blame them. I was only giving them 5%, while they tried to be my friend. I am sad that I don't have the connection with them now. I see on Facebook they are still really close and involved in each others lives. I would definatly focus more on friends in high school.
Middle school....I wouldn't go back there for anything!
Childhood is full of great memories. I was raised in a neighborhood full of girls. Nakomi was the place to be. I enjoyed riding my bike, playing house, Price is Right board game....and more importantly when I think back to Nakomi I feel safe and loved. My mom and dad were always around and I had no doubt they loved me. We ate dinner together as a family...mom tried to start a family game night, I think that lasted two weeks...I didn't like Chinese Checkers. If I could edit my childhood I would take away when my Grandaddy died. After his death, I started to fear death. Like really, really, really fear death. It got really bad....I feel bad about what I put my parents through during that time. They stood by me during my many "attacks" but I am sure I drove them nuts!
I am out of order now...but my 20's I think I would edit a really bad relationship. I don't even what to get into it here, but I am so thankful that I got out of it, and eventually met my husband. I started to really turn my life towards God during my 20's. I was so curious about faith and a relationship with God. I turned my life around, and sadly the few friends I had in college I had to take a break from. I needed to heal, be still, and focus on me. I am sad about those friendships too, they are all really close, I see it on FB. They are great people, I just wasn't good to them.
My 20's did bring me my husband, an amazing man and friend. My relationship with restored with Jesus (thank you for grace....), a marriage, a move, and so many adventures. The fear of death still rears its ugly head, but I claim God's promises (and take some meds), and can beat them. My 20's make me smile, but I do have quite a few edits.
30's brought our battle with infertility and I wouldn't change a thing. This time was priceless for Colin and I and our relationship with each other and God. It was so hard, lots of tears....but the story God wrote is one of HOPE! I love looking back at that time, knowing His hand was on us and he was with us. Plus we have a sweet, almost one year old now. Thank you God for the amazing gift of family....and Camden. I think that I hear my little man now....sorry this is so disconnected, I never claimed to be a writer.
Jeramiah 29:11
I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
Em
Em
1 comment:
It was wonderful!! I just found your blog.
I too enjoyed the book and think your post is an excellent way to apply it. thanks emily
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